It Ain't Real - What Never to Say to a Writer

From: kateelliott Date: December 1st, 2008 06:24 am (UTC) (Link)

My two cents.

on the movie question: I do think some people just don't read, so they really don't associate books with something they recognize.

ideas: my experience with this (admittedly often irritating) question is that most people who ask it REALLY DON'T KNOW, because they don't get ideas in that way. They may do other amazing things, like be able to look at a block of wood and turn it into a great piece of furniture, or listen to an engine and figure out what is wrong with it, or match colors for interior decoration, or do high level math, or whatever, but don't have the storytelling gene.

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From: kenyonsf Date: December 1st, 2008 03:45 pm (UTC) Annoying questions (Link)

I think that's right, many people don't read. Probably that's the genesis of my underlying annoyance at the question.

The Where do you get your ideas question is a cliche of our industry, so it is amusing to see it surface again and again. I'm sure you're right, it's not a slug aimed at the writer. Sometimes I answer, "If you were imprisoned in a room for six weeks and couldn't come out until you developed a story idea, you would find one." It's a way of saying that storytelling is really universal; it's not that strange.

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From: kateelliott Date: December 1st, 2008 06:06 pm (UTC) Re: Annoying questions (Link)

well, I can get annoyed when people ask me the movie question, as if my book isn't worth anything unless it's a movie. and I do think some people valuate like that. Feh to them!

But over time I've come to accept the ideas question as one asked often with genuine befuddlement or cluelessness.

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From: kateelliott Date: December 1st, 2008 06:24 am (UTC) (Link)

My favorite booksigning question, btw, has to be: Do you know where the cookbooks are?**

** substituting any other section for cookbooks.

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From: kenyonsf Date: December 1st, 2008 03:47 pm (UTC) Booksigning favs (Link)

My favorite booksigning event was when the bookstore owner's dog got into my purse and ate the sandwich I'd packed.

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From: kateelliott Date: December 1st, 2008 06:06 pm (UTC) Re: Booksigning favs (Link)

oh, that's funny

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From: kenyonsf Date: December 1st, 2008 06:16 pm (UTC) Re: Booksigning favs (Link)

Yeah, well I loved the "Where are the cookbooks?"
God, that says it all.

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From: graywave Date: December 1st, 2008 10:34 am (UTC) (Link)

My take on the 'ideas' question is here.

By the way, I never tell anyone I'm a writer. I just say I've taken early retirement ;-) It explains the poverty and avoids all the silly questions.

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From: kenyonsf Date: December 1st, 2008 03:56 pm (UTC) Ideas question (Link)

Thanks for the link. I hadn't seen that website before; I bookmarked it.

The world is divided into two types of writers. Those who love saying they are writers, and those who hope it never comes up. You appear to be in the latter category, and I may join you. Early retirement explains not only the poverty, but why it looks like you're not doing anything.

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From: (Anonymous) Date: December 1st, 2008 10:40 am (UTC) most annoying ones ever... (Link)

From a friend who dropped by in the middle of the day while I'm hard at work...

"Oh, are you doing that writing for fun thing again?"

From the same friend...

"Would I like to read it? Oh, bless you. That's cute."

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From: nobu Date: December 2nd, 2008 01:47 am (UTC) (Link)

As to the second question, about ideas... well, I've learned to answer that one with a completely random thing, usually something that doesn't exist. "Ideas? Oh, I just put shark glitter in my tea everyday before I sit down to write. Works like a charm. Literally."

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From: kenyonsf Date: December 2nd, 2008 04:25 pm (UTC) Ironic retorts (Link)

Good one. And I like to say,"Walla Walla. There's a P.O. Box in Walla Walla that sends ideas if you include a self-addressed envelope.)

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From: (Anonymous) Date: December 28th, 2008 05:21 pm (UTC) Questions and the idea factory (Link)

My particular answer to the idea question is to say "I borrow them from Neil." It's not really an answer but it confuses people enough to buy me time to figure out the question they are really asking. [Where do you come up with all these ideas? Dang, I want to know how to stop. I've got more than I can finish as it is.]

In some ways, the question of where to get ideas is a legitimate one. Let me clarify, when I go to a school or library program and a kid asks me that question, it's a legitimate question. When a "grown-up" asks, it's just annoying. (I'll answer kids as honestly and constructively as I can because they really don't know things like "what if" or the difference between an idea and a story and the schools aren't really good at helping them with that anyway.) My nightmare variation on that question is the offer of: "I've got a great idea that I'll give you and you can write it and we'll split the money." (My usual answer to that is: "How about we do it the other way? I'm full up on ideas but if you'll take one of mine and write it, I'll be happy to split the cash with you.")

Your note on "since you're not doing anything" really made me laugh. I live on my father's farm. The dear man seems incapable of understanding that writing isn't something that can be interrupted at the drop of a hat when he suddenly decides to restack the hay barn.

My current question that I cringe at is "Did you know that there's a massive copy-editing goof in chapter four?"

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From: kenyonsf Date: January 3rd, 2009 08:38 pm (UTC) Re: Questions and the idea factory (Link)

Very funny about the copy editing goof. "Oh," I responded once in that situation, "you mean Vancouver is NOT in northwest Canada?"

Given Really ugly mistakes, you just might try to brazen it out.

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From: (Anonymous) Date: December 28th, 2008 05:24 pm (UTC) sorry (Link)

Mea Culpa, didn't mean to be totally anonymous there. The previous post was just me again.

MKeaton

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From: occams_palhaco Date: January 14th, 2009 03:43 pm (UTC) Answer to annoying question (Link)

Kay said, "Just because I'm staring at the wall doesn't mean I'm not doing anything. I'm thinking, I'm plotting, I'm preparing to type."

Or, "I'm receiving my ideas from the emitter in the wall---oops. Now I'm going to have to kill you." Then smile. Mildly.

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From: (Anonymous) Date: January 16th, 2009 11:36 pm (UTC) Re: Answer to annoying question (Link)

This opens up a whole new set of options for the big annoying question. "Where do you get your ideas?" Author replies, deadpan: "From my emitter in the wall." Then if blank stares ensue, one could go on, "Do you ever wonder why they put emitters in walls?"

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From: kenyonsf Date: January 16th, 2009 11:46 pm (UTC) Re: Answer to annoying question (Link)

Meant to identify myself on that last.

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